After a lifetime of being a visible minority, living in China is an oddly liberating experience, a life where I just melt into the crowd.
Here in Shanghai, I am just another Chinese girl with black hair and brown eyes scurrying into the subway, mingling in the park, snacking on the street, shopping in the mall. No one can point me out as Chinese first and Malaysian second, or as an immigrant in the UK, or “the tall Asian girl” in my Canadian elementary school. It’s not that I’ve found my roots in Shanghai or I’ve come to embrace being ethnically Chinese; instead, I’m just darn happy I am like everyone else.
That is, until I open my big fat mouth, and the local Chinese person I’m talking to laughs at me, or worse, looks utterly confused.
Because I can’t speak Mandarin Chinese.
I am learning, am enrolled in a full-time language course at a Shanghai university. But until I finish the course, until I achieve maybe HSK level 6, I refuse to consider myself fluent, and I carry this inadequacy like it’s my biggest shame. I am Chinese who can’t speak Chinese. A banana, the word that’s haunted me all my life. “Yellow outside, white inside!” said my aunties, uncles, classmates, teachers.
So what, you might say. After all, there are lots of overseas Chinese who can’t speak Mandarin. It’s nothing to be ashamed of if you didn’t have the chance to learn it, or learn enough of it to be able to communicate like a native speaker.
But I’m not just “overseas Chinese.” I’m Malaysian, and I haven’t met a Malaysian Chinese person living in Shanghai who wasn’t fluent in Chinese. There are students of Chinese descent from the US, Britain, France, Sweden, the Philippines, and Brazil in my elementary level at the language school, but the Malaysians (and Singaporeans) are all high and mighty in the advanced classes.
Many of my conversations with local Chinese people go like this:
Local Chinese: Ni de *something something* de *something something* li mian bu shi *something something* ma?
Me: Ah… what? Sorry sorry, I didn’t understand all of that.
Local Chinese: Oh. You are not local?
Me: No.
Local Chinese: Korean or Japanese?
Me: No no, I am overseas Chinese.
Local Chinese: American?
Me: No, I am from Malaysia.
Local Chinese: Wah! Malaysia! Nice country, I hear! I have a cousin there!
Me: Yes, Malaysia is very nice.
Local Chinese: So why you cannot speak Chinese? The Chinese from Malaysia I know can speak very good putonghua, hen lihai de. Singaporeans also speak very good Chinese.
Me: I never had a real chance to learn… mei xue guo lah.
Local Chinese: Must learn properly.
Or, the usual taxi conversations:
Taxi driver: So which route you want to take? Do you want to *says something in rapid Chinese* or *something else in rapid Chinese*?
Me: Ah… whichever is fastest… sorry, I didn’t understand all of that.
Taxi driver: Korean right? I can tell.
Me: No, Malaysian.
Taxi driver: You don’t look Malay? You look like Asian person?
Me: I am overseas Chinese, raised in Malaysia.
Taxi driver: Oh… quality of life good in Malaysia? High salary?
Me: Okay lah.
Taxi driver: Why you from Malaysia but cannot speak Chinese? My Malaysian and Singaporean passengers all speak such fluent Chinese, Singapore is near you right?
Me: Many Malaysian huaren can speak Chinese… just not me.
Taxi driver: Must learn. The other day I had German passengers who spoke perfect Chinese! No mistakes! They didn’t have strange accents like you.
Me: ……….
If you are a Chinese Malaysian in Shanghai/China who can’t speak “proper” Chinese, contact me. If you are a laowai who speaks perfect Chinese, contact me too so I have more people to be jealous of. In the meantime, I’m continuing my quest to master this darn language, and get rid of the banana stigma, once and for all. Zai jian!
The real deal would be stop considering yourself Chinese, which will solve you a lot of problems. My parents are french but I’m born in Germany and I never felt unease for being a french-blooded german – the place where I got my education and everything else. When I go to france I say “i’m german” and they answer me “your French is amazing”, and I’m just happy about that. The funny thing is that you are proud of Malaysia but still you want to be Chinese, when you are not.
It’s not easy. I’m a Malaysian Chinese and absolutely proud of the fact that I am Malaysian AND Chinese. I don’t know why but I always bring my Chinese pride whenever I am, no matter it was Malaysia, China or the United Kingdom, which are the three countries I’ve lived before. Maybe, just maybe, like Christine said, it is the race-based policies in our country that reminds us that I am ethnically Chinese.
Obviously, your English is fantastic. Out of curiosity, what other languages did you learn growing up?
Race-based policies in Malaysia and being a visible minority have never let me forget I am ethnically Chinese. I will never be a Chinese citizen, but I do want to learn the language.
Jen – English is my first language, and I learned Malay when I was 12, in order to go to school in Malaysia. That’s all.
Ha ha, nice. I love the way Japanese people are always amazed to know that I speak four languages. Learning Japanese was probably the funnest experience in my life. But now, I have a chinese girlfriend (not a banana!). Any suggestions for where do I start? Maybe that’s make a good blog post for you.
Also about fluent laowai, try @invisiblegaijin on twitter. not fluent yet but i’m sure he’ll be there soon.
I know exactly how you feel. I am German and I can’t speak fluent German which confuses many of the Germans I meet. I grew up speaking English and Spanish and didn’t start learning German until I was an adult so I speak with a very heavy American accent and I am forever working on my fluency… although I am not sure I will be able to get rid of the accent.
I also lived in Singapore for a few years. I was so happy to live someplace where I could work and write in English. (which put me back a few years with my German when I returned)
Good luck and enjoy Shanghai such a great place to live!
As a fellow Chinese-learning foreigner, I think I should warn you that “HSK level 6″ and “end of full-time language course” are very far from being fluent.
I didn’t know it at first, and when I first heard about HSK and tried the tests, I thought HSK 8 (for the old one) would be like native level. Now that I am there, I can measure how far I still am from real fluency …
That said, it’s more and more fun as you advance ;o)
Ah, so you know what it’s like to be a white guy here. Every single conversation, within 3 seconds…
“How long have you been in China”
“X Years”
“Wow! For X years you speak Chinese really well! Can you read too?”
“A bit.”
“Wow. Amazing!”
I actually had that exact conversation when I first came to China… but I’d only been here a couple days..
“How long have you been in China”
“2 days”
“2 years?”
“2 DAYS”
“Wow! For 2 days you speak Chinese really well! Can you read too?”
“A bit.”
“Wow. Amazing!”
[the notion of studying Chinese abroad is still new to many Chinese]
Ady – Recently, I came across a book called “Easy Romantic Chinese,” photo here: http://twitpic.com/3r4why
I found it pretty fascinating… all the words you need to romance your Chinese partner. Maybe I WILL blog about it.
Jacquou – Thanks for scaring me… I will now drown myself in the depths of despair.
Michael – I know what you mean. One of my (white) American classmates last year hated it whenever anyone, Chinese or not, praised her for knowing a few phrases of Mandarin. “What’s the big deal?” she’d rage. “It’s only ‘please, thank you, how much is this damn shirt.’ Nothing impressive, after a year living here!” I’d just laugh and tell her, “Well, if you looked like me, you’d be nagged about your terrible Chinese, so appreciate the good comments!”
I’m one of those annoying white people with great Mandarin (I am regularly mistaken for a local if I am heard but not seen). I agree with Jacquou – neither of those standards are fully fluent, and it IS much more fun the more you learn. I often think of Chinese as a series of steps rather than a gradual learning curve. You work really hard and feeling like you aren’t going anywhere and then BANG! something clicks and you go up a level.
A banana-friend and I once discussed the pros/cons to our color and language proficiency. The con to being a white girl speaking Chinese is that I have the exact same conversations over and over, and most people really want to talk to me (such a novelty!) even when this little introvert just wants to get errands done as soon as possible and go home. The pro is being flattered constantly
My friend is expected to have good Chinese and corrected when she misses tones, and if she says she is American ends up having a long discussion about where she’s “really” from. The pro is her ability to blend into a crowd and get better prices at markets.
By the way, sorry if it sounded like a pompous ass about the 2 days thing…..when I first got to Shenzhen my Chinese was very weak. That girl was quite clearly trying to butter me up because I was shopping for a cell phone.
The funniest was my first time in Asia (in Taiwan) and at a big family dinner (my TWnese friends obviously), someone asked about the foreigner. Within seconds another blurted out that I could speak Chinese (ha!)… when asked directly if I could speak, I responded, “一点点”, and the whole table erupted in cheers. I’m surprised they didn’t just hand me the HSK certificate right there on the spot!
The typical conversation in Shanghai runs in loud and short sentences:
Amazing. I can’t believe it. You must have been here for years.
About eight years.
No wonder! Eight years, and speak so well.
I didn’t learn Mandarin in China.
What?! You didn’t learn here?! Where did you learn?
In America, in Taiwan.
Ah! You learned in Taiwan! That’s why you have a Taiwan accent. Yeah, I could tell. Taiwanese speak with an accent.
So, I have a Taiwan accent?
Taiwanese speak with a Taiwan accent. You know?! You read (gestures with hands)?
Yeah. I studied Chinese in university.
You can write (gestures with hands)?!
(Ad nauseum…)
If I don’t mention Taiwan then my accent is ascribed to Tianjin (a la Da Shan), Beijing (“you speak with a real Beijing accent”), or what ever place is rattling the questioner’s mind at the time.
Must be very difficult for overseas Chinese. As others have mentioned, as a white person with a certain level of Chinese skill (around intermediate), I always get the enthusiastic complements. It’s been a while since I’ve been in China, but even here, I can literally walk up to a random Chinese stranger (there are quite a few in my university) and say “你好” and get an instant reaction.
The act of reading or writing (or typing) in Chinese sometimes gets a similar reaction. I remember an episode at the local Chinese church where I began trying to read out the church bulletin. A woman nearby saw me and reacted very enthusiastically with each character I recognized.
Also, when I was there I have the feeling I got a pass on a good number of cultural norms and taboos that you might not. Unfortunately, specific examples evade me.
i don’t understand why you need to feel inferior to those who speak mandarin chinese better than you.
and it doesn’t make any sense to call yourself chinese. maybe you’re indeed oriental, or you’re asian. you never grew up in china, and i promise you this, despite your ancestor originating from china, the chinese government will, without hesitation, reject you flatly if you ever want to be a PR or citizen.
and in regards to those conversations, they are just being stereotypical, aren’t they?
I know how you feel. I am an American Born Chinese as well. I can’t read or write. . .but at least I speak enough to get by and for work. But I am learning every day. Don’t worry you’ll be fine, just keep at it.
Wahlau how can must learn!
hum, how can you be banana if you’re Malaysian Chinese, “white” outside doesn’t really compute in my mind for Malaysian:p
Joke aside, if you’re oversea Chinese there is an urge for the local to think you must feel relived to return to the “motherland”, whether you only ascribe it culturally or actually feel for it, or barely care. ABC probably gets it the hardest, they’re American by all accounts, but Chinese will want to call them Chinese because they think that’s what they should be. It doesn’t matter even if they’re like the nth generation. Hapa probably gets it to a lesser degree.
Hey Christine, you speak Mandarin just fine, like a local. Don’t be too self conscious. You have no problem catching up with the normal speed, no accent either at all. You gotta trust the judgment from a local person’s perspective. Remember I am the one who actually has been with one annoying white person that speaks perfect Mandarin since last century. I am now comparing you to Andy. To make you even feel better, I know an America born Shanghainese Chinese who was living in Shanghai who did not speak any languages except for English and bad Shanghainese.
Aww.. this has got to be one of the cutest blogs i’ve ever read! As a Chinese growing up in America, I can definitely relate with your situation though I think Americans have a somewhat worse rep among the natives, haha. I definitely feel it in my Chinese Lit class in college now too. Everyone else in my class grew up in Asia and their Chinese is really good so it’s hard not to feel self conscious. It’s okay~ Jia You! (add oil) i’m sure you’ll be fine.
Chin-Chen – I am a banana because I can’t speak Cantonese either… and I think and dream in English. However, it’s true that I am not a banana in Penang or my dad’s hometown in Johor. Can speak Hokkien!
Cindy, thanks for the reassurances. Your annoying white guy who speaks perfect Mandarin is cool
“ABC probably gets it the hardest, they’re American by all accounts, but Chinese will want to call them Chinese because they think that’s what they should be”
That’s because of skin color. Ironically, Chinese are reluctant to call a Korean or Japanese 老外 because that term is expressly reserved for 大鼻子/洋鬼子. So for a Chinese anyone with *ahem yellow skin (???) is ‘like them.’ The idea of an Asian who doesn’t speak Mandarin is baffling, even heart-attack inducing to some.
Likewise, a white person who can say two words in Chinese must be a magician/possessed/devil spirit/super genius/中国通. Also heart-attack inducing. Alert the media.
This comment is so true. Although Chinese people have do have special names for Koreans and Japanese…
It’s not quite so bad in Shanghai, but as a white guy, when I go deeper into China, a simple 你好 is sufficient to induce an overflow of compliments about how good my Chinese is, how perfect my pronunciation is, etc etc. It weakens the compliment a bit.
I’m Canadian-born Chinese, whose family speaks Cantonese. My Cantonese is pretty pathetic at best, and I’m currently learning Mandarin. It’s sad because I studied it when I was younger but basically retained nothing…so I’m at the beginning again.
The hardest part for me is just getting over the shame of not being able to speak Chinese, seeing other people (including non-Chinese people) speaking it at levels far superior to my own, and also the nagging feeling that I’ll never become fluent and should just give up now. I have a lot of friends who speak Chinese (either Cantonese or Mandarin) quite well, but even they note that they have minor accents, or that they’re not completely fluent. And then it’s like…well, if these people who are completely functional in Chinese struggle themselves, I’ll probably never become fluent.
Well, at least I have great stroke order…
Kelly, the biggest challenge is where you live. It’s when you’re ‘forced’ to speak the new language that you really push the limit.
While I studied Chinese in Canada for a few years, I got more ‘breakthroughs’ in 1 week in Shenzhen than anytime before that. At first it was physically draining, but then you get acclimated and your mind realizes, “I’m speaking Chinese now”
Just watch a ton of movies/tv shows and your listening will be great, if you want to learn, take a 3 month or 6 month course in a Mainland Chinese city, — extra props if you can avoid Shanghai, Beijing, etc.. there’s too many Expats around there. You need to really put yourself in a place where you have no choice but to be resourceful with your Chinese.
I’m Chinese-Canadian and my Mandarin sucks. I can understand all right and my accent is pretty good because I grew up listening to my parents speak it, but I always responded in English.
The result? When I’m in China, people think I’m a native speaker, but probably a really dumb one who can only make really simple sentences …
I empathise with you, Christine. I’m a Chinese Singaporean who is monolingual in spite of 12 years of very arduous compulsory Mandarin classes. To make matter worse, I’m not fluent in any Chinese dialects either.
I no longer live in Singapore but I still remember the many times I was chastised by Chinese Singaporean taxi drivers, bus drivers, shopkeepers and quite a few elderly Chinese for not being able to converse effectively in Chinese.
I would love very much to visit China but the shame of not being able to speak my own mother tongue has held me back.
Hi CS, thanks for the comment. I too remember being in Singapore and feeling utterly bewildered when spoken to in Mandarin. However, it wasn’t the elderly Singaporean Chinese who later berated me about not speaking Mandarin… it was people from China, the shopgirls and hairdressers and mainland Chinese students on campus. Many struggled to communicate with me in English when I made it known my Mandarin wasn’t up to par, but, infuriatingly, some of these people felt they had the right to tell me off for not being able to speak a language not my own (I identify very strongly with being Hokkien and speaking Hokkien).
Anyway, don’t let not speaking Mandarin hold you back from visiting China. There are enough of us bananas running around China, plus, everyone would assume you’re Korean or Japanese!
Thank you for sharing your experiences, Christine. It’s reassuring to know that I’m not alone in feeling this way.
And I will indeed visit China some day!
I see what you are saying. American born Chinese here, and although I grew up with a large Chinese-speaking community, many of the kids of my generation and I don’t speak really the langauge either, but I do understand it perfectly fine thanks to the 8 years I spent in Chinese school. I guess language is just personal interest of the individual..but each to their own. However, that does not mean I don’t connect to my roots just b/c I don’t speak the language! I find it utterly pathetic that people think if you don’t speak the langauge, you know nothing..although speaking the language does help connect you, but not the only option. At least I and my friends have some familiarity Most understand it but don’t speak
. I’ve been to China many times and the area I was from people didn’t really mock me because I think they understood that although I look Chinese, I was never raised there so therefore it shouid be expected that I have a different outlook compared to them. Because of the fact they accepted that and I accepted of whom they are..we got along fine and I love visiting China more than anything 
. If they were those hogwashy people who gossip and spread shit…I would never go back..nor go to any country where the majority of the people act like a$$es. There were many times where I made efforts to speak in Cantonese and somtimes it came out very bad, but they never mocked me, but respectfully helped me to make what I said better. And b/c of that my Chinese is a bit better and I find it more enjoyable than before and am interested to expand it by taking canto classes for college this semester (need a language elective). I also got those banana comments too a few times when going to different areas, but really…why would you let this bother you? I didn’t for me…yes I’m American, and maybe always be American,but I have huge respect for my Chinese heritage. I felt I got the familiarty of both worlds. Don’t feel bad just becasue you can’t speak the language, you are inferior, you are not. People comment all the time and crticize for stupid things. Embrace and love what interests you and fulfill it. By the way, if you want to learn to speak Mandarin, there is a website called LiveMocha that’ll help you learn..suggest you try it out 
“I guess language is just personal interest of the individual..but each to their own. However, that does not mean I don’t connect to my roots just b/c I don’t speak the language! I find it utterly pathetic that people think if you don’t speak the langauge, you know nothing..although speaking the language does help connect you, but not the only option.”
Very very misleading. Sorry, dude. If you are not good at the language you have nothing connected to your heritage or culture. Language equals Culture. Period. Tell me exactly how you can connect to your Chinese culture if you don’t understand what they are doing and saying. Dumbest comment ever. If you don’t understand anything in Chinese you are just yellow-skinned American but never be Chinese.
More obviously, if a white guy is very fluent in Chinese he is more connected to Chinese culture than you are. He will be way more likely to become white-skinned Chinese than you will become Chinese.
If you are not fluent in Chinese it’s totally fine. But, don’t say a bullshit like “I don’t know Chinese but I know my heritage!”
Again, language equals culture. There is no other way to be connected to your culture.
Heh heh heh.
Sorry, gotta laugh. Got same problem, and similar problem in reverse.
I speak Cantonese. So white I glow in the dark.
And yet…. some conversations are predictable:
http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/2010/10/smart-monkey.html
Singlish also predictable, lah:
http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/2010/11/i-know-beng.html
Setempotemponya, bitjara paling predictable sadja:
http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/2010/11/white-devil.html
But no, I don’t speak decent Mandarin. Not practice, no opportunity, no reason to learn it. Just not enough Mandarin-speakers in my part of town (other than white people, that is).
I totally understand how you feel.. I am from HK and working in Beijing, but my Mandarin is so bad…. And usually being mistaken as Korean or something…. So if the taxi driver asked me where i come from, i just told them i am from Korea… Then i can have a quiet cab ride…
ABC who speaks pretty well, but not fluently – I ALWAYS get questions from the cab drivers – but my non-speaking friends whose Chinese is way worse than mine? Cab drivers instantly know where they want to go. So annoying.
As for the Malaysians who don’t speak Mandarin well – I know a couple, so you’re not alone. In fact one has been here 12 years – and her Chinese is getting worse, so you’re one up on at least one person! So take heart!
As an ABC, I definitely sympathize with you. I’ve had about 12 years of Chinese lessons, and I live in a city with a good amount of Chinese speakers. I must be horrid at learning foreign languages, though. I’ve retained barely any of it and I’m basically illiterate in Chinese. It’s quite embarrassing, so like “nao” mentioned earlier, I just try to speak with somewhat slowly and with simple sentences to try to save myself the embarrassment of breaking out the Chinglish. If Chinese people think I’m just slow-minded, oh well.
My boyfriend on the other hand, sucks up foreign languages really fast. Although he is not Chinese (i.e. little opportunity to speak with native speakers) and didn’t start learning it until high school, he is catching up quickly to my level. He can recall terms that he’s used only once before years ago and he’s already retaught me some terms already. Aside from incorrect tones here and there, his accent is good.
It’s kind of disgusting, lol.
I don’t think I’ll ever be fluent unless I live in Asia for a long period of time, though my one brain cell will probably forget English if that happens.
i’m a canadian-born chinese who’s visited shanghai a few times, and i know exactly how you feel (in fact, i’m going to be flying to shanghai again in a few days)
growing up, i spoke cantonese around the house, and although my parents could speak mandarin, they never taught me (something i regret to this day)…i can only understand simple phrases but cannot speak. as you know, cantonese is virtually useless in shanghai, and i’m petrified at even the thought of having to speak with locals there for fear of being chastised for not being able to speak mandarin.
as they say in chinese, “add oil”! study hard!
Nice article! I’m another one of those Philippine-born Chinese “banana”. I had a similar experience the last time I went to China. Whenever I encounter those “something something…”, I just try to guess what they’re trying to say.
I can understand around 50-70% of spoken mandarin, but I find it hard to express what I wanted to say. I think 50% is good enough for getting to different places.
I guess I need to study more.
Anyone wants to practice with me?
Christine, I’m just like you! Malaysian Chinese who went to Shanghai without any Mandarin ability. I stayed for four years, did a few semesters at a uinversity (Jiaotong), and ended up at ‘intermediate’ level — though far from fluent. Your post really summed up a lot of my experiences in Shanghai. There’s no way around it, Mandarin is a tough language to learn, but you’ll get there!
Hi my fellow Malaysian bananas. I know exactly how you feel about this, that is why i have decided to enroll in a mandarin study program in china once i graduate. i currently study in the US. A weird thing here is that initially, i though i could escape not being able to speak mandarin in an English speaking country like the states. How wrong I was! Due to the thousands (yes thousands) of students here from China, I am often confronted with the same question of being Chinese but being unable to speak mandarin. Well, I am not totally banana as I like you, speak hokkien with my family.
As a Malaysian Chinese who is working in the U.S.A, I can somewhat relate to your situation. I consider myself a super-banana, as my proficiency in cantonese, hokkien & mandarin is worst than a retarded monkey. Through my first 16 years in Malaysia I remember enduring the constant onslaught of chinese-speakers berating my inability to speak the same language that reflects my own skin color. The worst part is being segregated by a group of chinese speakers during the high school days. After I moved overseas and went to an American college, I realized that people identified me more as an Asian-American instead of a Chinese, which was great~!
But alas, the curse of the banana continues even in America, as fellow chinese students come up to me, clearly identifying themselves with my skin color and go “Ni Hao. Ni shi zhong guo ren shi ma”, which I hastily replied in incoherent mutters. I then proceed to try and communicate in English while explaining that I never got the chance to learn the damn language, but this is clearly unacceptable in chinese-speaker minds. IT’S LIKE AN AMERICAN WHO DOESN’T SPEAK ENGLISH ZOMFG HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?? Then they gimme this look, every single goddamn time like I’m inferior to them, thinking “lulz this guy can’t speak chinese~ Xiang Jiaooooo HAHAHAHAHAHAHA”
So now whenever chinese people ask if I’m chinese, I just say that I’m an aspiring Korean pop star musician, and proceed to slaughter them with my command of English. It’s less hassle that way, and everybody knows that Koreans are the coolest asians around yo.
So yea, woman, use your god-given charms. If people think you look like a korean, hell, go with the flow.
Hola Christine,
I have something to share though.
I am Malaysian from Sabah. I never consider myself ac Chinese, since I know I grown up in Sabah with the DUSUN community, since my mom is AND dad is of DUSUN ethnicity. The thing is that, I never realized I appear to be a CHINESE guy to the eyes of others, especially the people in the city (Kuala Lumpur), when I further my study.
I kept coming across peoples in University Malaya and the peoples in the restaurants, and they will converse in Mandarin (or maybe Cantonese, since I do not know both). This people just do not know that the Sabahan & Sarawakian peoples can appear as fair as their Chinese colleagues. It doesn’t matter, but I felt weird that the same questions about my origin being asked over and over again.
Ah Chai selling “dapao” : ” %&^(*&^*(&(*^(“? asking me.
ME: ” Sorry, I don’t speak Chinese”
Ah Chai: “huh….?”
Me: ” Wo bu hui jiang hua yue”/ ( I donno how to spell them. lol. I simply pick up from scratch in the internet).
And It still happen now. And I went back to Sabah, I met my Grandma from my dad’s side.
I ask her why is her name ‘Kuilim’? DOESN’T IT SOUND CHINESE?
I never question this before, not until I kept getting the same ‘Mandarin conversation lol.
So she went on to tell me her real life’s story. She IS INDEED a Chinese. When she married my grandpa, her name from OBVIOUSLY CHINESE NAME , ‘Kui Lim’, was changed into ‘Kuilim’.
And I now know where I came from. I am a bit shocked though.
#### Sorry I write too long, and it don’t really match the topic, yet my point is, NEVER GIVE UP on your lesson. I am currently self-learning Mandarin, since I have the intention to shocked my Supposed-to-be-close CHINESE FRIENDS, that I finally be able to speak.lol.
And the Chinese here are FOR real won’t stick well, if you are not ONE OF THEIR KIND ( can speak Mandarin). My Chinese roomate is so quiet. I felt bad.
Anyway, Jia You! Good Luck living there. JUST ignore the Cab driver
-Johnben Martin.
Hi Johnben, thanks for your story. Now that you know you have some Chinese blood in you, does that drive your desire to study Mandarin? Or do you just want to shock your friends?
Hi Christine.
Languages, Peoples and Few cultures fascinate me. I am currently doing Espanol major.
I wish I can take Mandarin along , yet I CAN’T. Even for minor course, yet, it clashes with my daily schedule. To shock my friends- is not real after all. I simply want to be more available for this language since we have many Chinese community here, and I do have existing Chinese aunties , uncles and cousins.
To add, it opens door for other opportunities that may not land onto me if I am not fluent in this language. After all, you do not have to push to learn this. One commenter mentioned about- YOU CAN’T UNDERSTAND YOUR HERITAGE IF YOU CAN’T SPEAK THE LANGUAGE/ UNDERSTAND IT.
Bahasa Melayu: “Jangan hiraukan dia. Dia cuma berikan pandangan sendiri, tidak bermakna ia benar. Hhahah.. Apapun, apa kamu buat di China? Kamu kerja? ”
Johnben
People here on Lamma think I’m Mayasian, lol. It’s very rare for Chinese Canadians to land here on Lamma Island. ha ha ha ha.
im a New Zealand born chinese, i can speak cantonese fluently but native speakers don’t understand me completely, mostly because i have a New Zealand accent LOL, currently im learning mandarin, its so hard, i learnt it when i was younger but i forgot everything, so i needed to revisit everything. so if i ever go to shanghai I will be a banana like you!!!
i want to HUG YOU because i am of chinese/kadazan descent and for the longest time i used to get so much shit in KL (when i was studying there) from looking obviously chinese but not knowing how to speak the chinese language. i’m now married to a Kuantan dude who knows cantonese and mandarin and now i can rest easy knowing that he will order food and it will not end up wrong.i love my culture, im fiercely proud of both my kadazan and chinese heritage, but i’m not keen on learning the language.never have and never will.language is an important part of our culture, yes, but it is not its’ entire focal point.
this is hilarious!
Hallo Daphne-
Wah,, Finally I see a Sabahan here.
Smiles.
Well. Usually the mix Kadazan are from Penampang rite? I am from Tambunan. I got some CHINESE mix as well, And again, everytime I went to Chinese restaurant to eat, I will be thrown with Chinese words- Just like what you experience, LOL.
And bila sya pi jogeng di tepi tasik, ada tu unkle2 mau cakp Cina. Adoi,, sy ndak Layan. Main angguk2 jak.. By the way, I am as well currently studying here,
Happy Holiday
Johnben
Nice to see someone else on the same boat, I’m also a Chinese-Malaysian who grew up in Canada and can’t speak any chinese dialect
I was wondering, how do people in China see Chinese-Malaysians? Do they consider us equivalent to another Asian country like Korea/Japan, do they see us as one of them, or something completely different?
Most local Chinese I meet in Shanghai see me as a long lost relative — welcomed and treated kindly, though they shake their heads at my strange ways. I really did feel the most acceptance in Fujian, which is where my great-grandfather was from; because I speak some Hokkien, I wasn’t seen as an Asian foreigner.
hi there! Christine! ^^, just want to say Happy Learning Chinese ^^, well my situation is quite same (although i am still at M’sia), i can speak but it is like a direct Eng -> Chinese….moreover, with my ed. atmosphere within the Bumi’s, i am getting more and more isolated from Chinese community, even my Malay friends outnumber my Chinese friends. I suck at Hakka(my supposed to be dialect) but i can speak some Hokkien and Cantonese..however what envies my cousins is my ability to speak Sarawak Malay (I am a sarawakian) fluently…xDD also, i am 90% Chinese illiterate i can barely read and write but most of the basics i can
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